Summer’s Almost Over, Now What?

“When thinking about life, remember this: no amount of guilt can solve the past, and no amount of anxiety can change the future.”

— Unknown

You're out for a walk in the park, enjoying the beautiful day. You see a piece of litter on the ground, but you walk past it, thinking someone else will pick it up. As you continue your walk, you start feeling a nagging sense of guilt.

Why?

Because you know you could have easily picked it up and disposed of it properly, but you chose not to. This small moment highlights how guilt can arise from our everyday actions and decisions, even when they seem insignificant.

As the summer months come to an end, parents often find themselves grappling with a distinct type of guilt.

While the season is intended to be a time of relaxation, fun, and bonding, the pressures of managing schedules, keeping children entertained, and meeting expectations can lead to feelings of inadequacy.

This guilt can manifest in various ways:

1. The "Did I Do Enough?" Guilt

• Parents often question whether they made the most of the summer. Did we take enough trips? Did I spend enough quality time with my kids? These thoughts can create a sense of guilt, especially when comparing yourself to others who may have had more elaborate vacations or activities.

2. The "Overbooked or Underbooked?" Guilt

• Striking the right balance between structured activities and free time can be challenging. Some parents feel guilty for overloading their children with camps, classes, and outings, worrying that their kids didn’t have enough downtime. Others may feel guilty for not planning enough, fearing that their children missed out on enriching experiences.

3. The "Back-to-School" Guilt

• As the new school year approaches, many parents start to feel guilty about the things they didn’t accomplish over the summer—whether it’s academic prep, completing summer reading lists, or simply feeling like they should have done more to help their children transition smoothly into the next grade level.

4. The "Self-Care" Guilt

• Summer is supposed to be a break for parents too, but finding time for self-care can lead to guilt. Did I take too much time for myself and neglect my kids? Or did I not take enough time and end up burnt out? This internal struggle often leaves parents feeling they’re not prioritizing either themselves or their children adequately.

Quick and Practical Tips to manage summer guilt:

Awareness is key. When you catch yourself spiraling into shame, stop and try these:

• Reflect & Reframe:

  Take a moment to reflect on the summer, acknowledging both what went well and what didn’t. Instead of dwelling on what you missed, focus on the positive moments you shared with your children. Reframe any guilt by recognizing that your intentions were good, and remember that no summer is perfect.

• Practice Self-Compassion:

  Be kind to yourself. Parenting is full of challenges, and it’s impossible to do everything. Understand that it’s okay not to meet every expectation. Treat yourself with the same compassion you would offer a friend who’s feeling guilty. Allow yourself to accept that you did your best with the time and resources you had.

• Communicate with your kids:

  Sometimes, a simple conversation with your children can alleviate much of the guilt you’re feeling. Ask them about their favorite memories from the summer and listen to what stood out to them. You might be surprised to find that what they enjoyed most were the simple moments together, not the big events you worried about missing.

• Set Realistic Expectations:

  Guilt often arises from setting expectations that are too high. As you plan for future summers, consider setting more realistic goals that allow for flexibility and downtime. Recognize that it’s the quality of time spent together, not the quantity of activities, that truly matters.

Guilt and shame are part of what makes us human—they remind us to consider the impact of our actions on others. But managing these emotions is all about harmony.

As the summer winds down, it’s time to shift your attention from what didn’t happen to what lies ahead. The back-to-school season is an opportunity to start fresh, both for your children and for you as a parent.

Let go of any lingering guilt by focusing on what you can control moving forward.

The school year is full of opportunities for growth, learning, and connection. By redirecting your energy toward the positive experiences to come, you can leave the summer guilt behind and step into the new season with a sense of purpose and excitement

Remember, guilt can be a powerful guide to positive change, but only if we handle it thoughtfully and with care.